13 Cons To Owning Classic Cars No One Talks About

Buy a classic car, they said. It will be fun, they said.

Let’s make something clear right now: owning a classic car is like having a baby. It needs constant attention, leaks all over the show, and makes noises that chill you to your core.

Then, when you are just about to have a complete breakdown, the baby/car beats you to the punch. So why do we do it? It’s for those rare moments of utter bliss when all the stars align and your baby purrs down the road, making you feel like a million bucks. Please note: If your actual baby starts purring, you may want to have it serviced.

So, if you are considering turning that classic car bedroom poster into a reality in your driveway, read through our list of cons that no one ever talks about.

You Want How Much?

Classic car folk are unhealthily obsessed with things like paint condition, accident damage, service histories, rarity, matching numbers, etc. Sellers can be very selective about what they tell you, so you’ll need to know exactly what to ask and look for.

If you don’t know what stroker or lowrider means, you better start studying. Just to avoid confusion, these terms refer to a longer-than-stock crankshaft, the transmission, and a lowered suspension, respectively.

Oil Leaks

Like that strange uncle nobody mentions, oil leaks are one classic car issue everyone avoids discussing. Whether it’s a constant drip that won’t go away or a more serious issue that turns your garage floor into a slippery mess, resolving an oil leak is time-consuming and expensive.

The only guarantee is that your classic car will have an oil leak, which will cost more to fix than you think.

Coolant Leaks

Let’s assume you have resolved your oil leaks. The next issue is keeping your car from dumping all its coolant on the road and overheating spectacularly.

The permanent solution is usually to replace all the corroded pipes, leaky radiators, broken thermostats, and rusted-out water pumps. It’s strange that the seller promised that they had done all this just a year ago. Don’t worry; they weren’t lying. You will also be repeating the procedure annually.

Transmission Leaks

The transmissions in most classic cars tend to be sticky, rough, and uncooperative when cold. That’s if they are working right. Most will be hiding some expensive secret inside their bell housings.

The only hint at the horrendous repair bill coming your way is a transmission leak that seems to worsen daily. You guessed it: the solution is an expensive rebuild that will have you homeschooling your kids for years.

Mystery Leaks

The oil leaks are finally gone, and the coolant and transmission system are brand new. So, what is that odd-colored fluid still dripping on the floor?

It’s just the car’s way of showing how much it loves you. Of all the classic car leaks, this one is harmless. Unless, of course, it’s the brake fluid, then you’re in some real trouble.

The Drinking Habit

You’ve finally eliminated the many leaks and oozing liquids escaping from your classic car. Now, it’s time to put some liquids back in. Whether you have settled on a ‘60s V8 or a ‘90s Japanese sports car, they all require regular stops at the gas station.

Old cars use more gas than your new hybrid for commuting. The engines are tired, the tech is old, and some gas is probably leaking out anyway.

Sorry, We Don’t Work on Those Cars Anymore

You need a service. Classic cars always need a service. The dealer that sells your make of car has no idea what to do with it. The last mechanic who remembers working on it retired twenty years ago.

So, your only option is a specialist. The person you bought the car from had the car regularly serviced by a ‘specialist’. It turns out the specialist charges about as much for each service as the value of the entire car.

Parts? What Parts?

The specialist takes two weeks to find the problem. They inform you they can’t source a replacement part because the car is too old.

You pay the diagnosis fee and collect the car. After a few weeks of driving it, you realize that not having a working instrument cluster isn’t so bad.

Rusty, My Old Friend

Just like that short little paragraph in your millionaire uncle’s will that leaves you with nothing but his exotic snail collection, horrendous rust is hiding just below the surface of your classic car, waiting to turn you into a pauper.

The older the car, the worse the rustproofing. Galvanizing only became mainstream in the 1990s, and even these can suffer from serious corrosion issues. Repairing or replacing panels is not cheap, so be sure to thoroughly inspect the car before buying.

You Expect Me To Start?

You buy a classic car to appreciate its beautiful lines and to drive it every other weekend. If you don’t leave the battery on a trickle charger, you will never get to enjoy that second part.

Even if the car is primed and ready to go, it may decide that today is not a good day to go out for a drive. Classic cars have ‘character,’ you see. This is the same as when someone describes their baby as ‘full of life’ or ‘inquisitive.’ Either way, you are in for a world of pain.

Daily Driver Doldrums

A cute little convertible from the 1980s can cost less than the downpayment on a new car. That could make it a more affordable daily commuter than taking the train to work. That’s what kids call a ‘life hack’ these days. It’s what crusty classic car owners call a ‘money pit.’

If they ever spoke about it. Which they don’t. Instead, you get to find out for yourself that pressing a 40-year-old car into daily service will cost you about the same as you make at your job. You drive to work to pay for the car you drive to work in. There’s a nice symmetry in that if only you didn’t have to sleep in the car as well.

Tech Is a Four Letter Word

Some classic cars are advertised with power windows, seats, aerials, and other high-tech items. The problem is that this tech was considered ‘high’ many decades ago.

Most of these ‘high-tech’ options will be complicated, old-fashioned, and barely working. Years of use and wear will have left you with expensive, intermittent electrical issues that will require serious patience and money to resolve.

I Just Want To Listen to That One Song

Even the most basic modern car will have a half decent sound system. You get Bluetooth at a minimum. Apple CarPlay and Android Auto are standard on all but the cheapest rides out there.

Your classic car may not even have a radio. If it does, it may be one of those 8-track things the seller charged you extra for because it was original. Well, original doesn’t play Ariane Grande. You will have to be content with the sounds and smells of your classic car instead.